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Ross Township, PA – In the wake of their stirring upset at the hands of the Bombers this past weekend, some members of the Bovid Canines headed to Buffalo Wild Wings this past Sunday. There, they discussed strategy for the upcoming set of weekend games versus the Black Sox and Warriors. It was decided there that a practice was to be called for on Thursday night.

Last night, four members decided to show up and work on their games, while the other members chose to stay home citing a scheduling bias that didn’t permit them to have there favorite outfit clean in time.

Doug Della-Penna, Joe Graff, Greg Wittmer, and Mike Martin all took multiple rounds of practice from their favorite server. With nary a break in the evening, the four even managed to pull in a few fans. Originally scheduled to last only two hours, the four stayed past midnight as they were determined to improve through multiple rounds.

“Its just not fair that it was scheduled on a Thursday night,” bemoaned Bill Jacobs. “I only have a couple shirts that I wear, and they were all dirty. If this had been scheduled later in the week, I would have more outfits clean.”

“I’ve been there nearly every night, and other guys didn’t go out until last night,” stated Bulldog leftfielder Brian Strom. “I’ve been there four times, and I’m out of clean clothes now. These other guys haven’t been out, so they’ve got plenty of clean clothes to wear. I’m going to have to hire a housekeeper if this keeps up.”

“Something needs to be done about how these practices are scheduled,” chimed in Adam Philipp. “Clearly, it is advantageous to players with more clothes, or who have someone who does their laundry. There must be a clothing bias on the part of Scott (Kramer), who schedules these things”.

Bulldogs manager Scott Kramer, who could not be reached for comment on this article, apparently was not in charge of scheduling this practice. That responsibility fell into the hands of onetime Bulldogs manager, Greg Wittmer (for more information on Wittmer’s brief time as manager, check out the archives).

“I just felt we needed to get the guys together and practice doing what we do best. With two games this weekend, I wanted to make sure we were clicking as a team.” These were the words of Wittmer when asked to comment on why he called a practice.

“Hey look, we knew going into the season that some guys had more clothes than others, and that guys who didn’t have the same wardrobe capacity as others might not be able to make some things,” cited Martin. “Now that they’ve realized they have to do more laundry, they want to punish the guys who either have more clothes, go out less, or do more laundry? Insane.”

“I’ve even heard some of them suggest that Scott should make them show up and play naked if they must,” added Graff. “If you have the clothes, and you can make it, great. If not, we’ll move on without you. No big deal. We knew about it before the season and could have put them on another team if it was going to be an issue. The guys chose not to do that because they didn’t want to break up the team by how extensive your wardrobe was.”

The Bulldogs stand to get a boost with their wardrobe issues when they unveil their new home uniforms this weekend.

“I can’t wait, and I’m excited that they’re sleeveless tops, cause it still leaves open the possibility we goes sans undershirt,” exclaimed Della-Penna.

Della-Penna, who spent most of Thursday’s practice working on communication with Graff, probably best summed up the feeling of the Bulldogs with the following comment.

“If Scott does make us play naked (due to lack of clothing), we’ll be the closest knit, best looking, hardest playing team in the league. Of course, there may be a rules violation when I step into the box with two 32 inch bats.”

Practice, or no practice; and clothing, or no clothing… these Bulldogs are ready to play some baseball.

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